Nothing sweeter...

There's nothing sweeter than the sunlight shining through the window on a precious little 5-day-old girl.

Well, it's also pretty sweet to see her big sister staring in at her, adoring her.

September 2, 2009

Well, this will be the birthdate of Landis Alethea Lanier. I am going in tomorrow morning at 7:30 to be induced! I cannot explain how excited I am about this. My appointment today was actually restful and not stressful. I have been anxious about going into labor, being overdue, and this baby continuing to get bigger! Well, today, since I am past my due date, they had to do a non-stress test on the baby to check on her heartrate and movements. So they hooked me up to the monitors and I had the beautiful sound of her heartbeat in the background. Then the in-office music was playing and Stevie Wonder's My Cherie Amor came on. That is the song Dee had played the night we were engaged. So my heart was really at peace and I just layed there listening to Landis' heartbeat. Then the doctor came in and said everything looked good. The baby is really ready and in position. So we're ready to go. Please pray for a safe and quick delivery for both Landis and I.

Whate'er My God Ordains is Right

We sang this song at church Sunday and it spoke to my heart SO much. It is a very simple old hymn without a lot of musical frills. We have great music at Christ Central, I mean GREAT. We have amazing talent in the musicians in instruments and song-writing & those worship times constantly stir my heart to worship. We listen to Christ Central music in our house almost every day & never tire of it! This song however, was very simple, almost unimpressive, but the words pierced my heart and the Lord spoke to me.

Whate'er my God ordains is right, Holy His will abideth.
I will be still whate'er He does, And follow where He guideth.
He is y God, Though dark my road.
He holds me that I shall not fall wherefore to Him I leave it all.

Whate'er my God ordains is right, He never will deceive me
He leads me by the proper path, I know He will not leave me
I take, content What He hath sent
His hand can turn my griefs away And patiently I wait His day

Whate'er my God ordains is right, Though now this cup in drinking
May bitter seem to my faint heart, I take it all unshrinking
My God is true, Each morn anew
Sweet comfort yet shall fill my heart And pain and sorrow shall depart

Whate'er my God ordains is right, Here shall my stand be taken
Though sorrow, need, or death be mine, yet I am not forsaken
My Fathers care is round me there
He holds me that I shall not fall And so to Him I leave it all.


This is so good for me whether I am waiting for a baby or trying to pay a bill. I need to be content and know that whatever my God has ordained is right.

UPDATE:
Then I read this today in a book about a totally unrelated topic...
"Viewing life through God's sovereignty and goodness is seeing every tiny detai as arranged for you by God. There is no such thing as fate, luck, or chance. God has purpose in your every circumstance. ... God is in control whether you like it or not!
It will help motivate you when you think "Lord, what do you have planned for me today? You are good, and You do all things well. ..." As you view your life through God's sovereignty and goodness, you will be continuously aware of God's purpose and grace in your life. And you will become more motivated to want to please God."
Martha Peace, The Excellent Wife

hmmm...The Lord really is aiming to teach me and direct my heart to be more content. I should listen. :)

Karis' new words

I think Karis is trying to use some words she's heard lately. It's been pretty funny.
Here are some of the quotes...

"Oh, that's cool."

"Mommy, look at the awesome stuff in that truck." (referring to a lawn mower & other equipment.)

"That is not perfect television." (when the HD channel froze for a moment.)

Mommy - "Karis, do you want something?"
Karis - "No, I want everything."

Good to have a few laughs from her!

"...his own way..."

The Lord has been so good to meet me today in the midst of so much. It's actually small things, but a lot of them all at once - 38 weeks pregnant & the discomfort that goes along with that, long hours of insomnia the past few nights, a nasty cold & cough, the desire to get so many little things done before I go into labor, & a very challenging little girl today.

I took Tylenol PM last night so I could potentially sleep more & it didn't work at all. I still only slept total for about 4-5 hours. So, I got up not feeling rested, but tired and drugged. Dee has helped me so much this morning giving me more time to rest, but to no avail. I couldn't sleep but for about 30 minutes out of the 2 1/2 hours I tried.

I got up feeling very groggy and walked through my messy house & Karis was having a very hard time with her attitude towards me. It was a very conscious effort to not lose my temper with her after multiple, back-to-back moments of discipline and talks. Even after all of that, she was still challenging me and refusing to obey. I told her again what the expectation was and just sat quiet. It was obvious that more discipline or more talking was not going to change her heart. I sat down to eat lunch and she just stood there. After a few minutes of silence, she said "I want to obey Mommy." And she did. Her attitude and her words completely changed and we talked a little about how God had changed her heart.

Then as I ate lunch, I sat down to write my Scripture Memory verse on a card...
Isaiah 53:6
"All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned - everyone - to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all."

I am just like my daughter. I want my own way. I turn from him. Sometimes, I just sit quietly, fighting my own sin, and wait for God to change me. God changes my heart, changes my attitude, changes my words.
It's my sin, my iniquity that was laid on Jesus.

Forgive me, Lord for fighting change so much after multiple moments of discipline from you. Help me to hear you in the quiet.

Random thoughts about prepping for the next one

It has hit me lately that I am spoiled in this stage I am in with one child who is potty trained, communicates pretty well, feeds herself, can mostly dress herself, and loves to "help". But, oh how life is about to change! And although the newborn stage with sleepless nights and lots of clothes changes due to poop & spit up can be challenging, I long to hold this precious little one and do it all over again!

I have typically tried to be consistent with Karis' schedule, getting her up at the same time every day, napping at the same time and training her to stay in her bed until we come to get her. Except the last couple months, I don't sleep too well. I find myself up sometime between 2am and 4am, checking facebook or watching random TV shows (lately ABC world news or Orange County Choppers). So, I sleep as long as I can with no alarm and as long as Karis will stay in her bed content, which can sometimes go until 8:30 or 9. (I know! I know! Landis may not sleep like this at all!)

So, this morning, I really wanted to enjoy a Starbucks biscotti that our dear friend Christy gave me before Karis got up. So, I didn't get Karis up until she stirred and enjoyed a little quiet time with my coffee, biscotti, and computer. Because in case you haven't been around Karis in a while, any waking moment with her is a talking moment! She sits here now in front of her cereal bowl, chatting away!! I know you may be laughing, but oh does it drain me by the end of the day!!

I am "feeling" the imminent arrival of Landis coming on quickly. So, in the next couple days, I will...

• pack hospital bags
• wash the covers to all the baby gear (bassinet, car seat, bouncy seat, crib bumper, etc)
• bake 3-4 loaves of banana bread
  
• make 2 extra meatloaves
• make 2-3 extra batches of pizza dough

We'll see what I get accomplished in between all the chatter :) and having to sit down to rest throughout the day.

Funny Things

Karis is very much a 2-year-old girl these days. Most of the time, she wakes up talking non-stop and comes up with some pretty funny things. So, I thought I would share a few of the comical moments lately.

#1
Mommy telling Karis to follow some instruction.
Karis does not comply.
Mommy uses a more firm voice and tells Karis to get it done "right now."
Karis turns toward Mommy, puts her small hands on each side of Mommy's face, and ever-so-gently says "Calm down."

#2
Karis playing as we visit with some friends and she walks over to me and says, "Mommy, I be right back, ok? You, chill!"
We just laugh and keep talking.
She returns a few seconds later and says, "Mommy, good job bein' chill!"

#3
Karis and I are in her room as I turn her bed back into a crib and make up her new toddler bed. I explain to her that Landis will sleep in the crib now.
She runs over to the empty crib and calls out, "Landis, where are you?"
She turns around and looks at my big tummy and say, "Oh, there you are!"

#4
We have been getting more and more baby things out and even bought a couple packs of diapers this weekend. A few times, Karis will say "This is for Landis, right, Mommy?"
"Yes, Karis."
And she yells out, "Landis is coming out!!"

Addicted to Craig's List

I find myself checking Craig's List A LOT throughout the day checking baby items and minivans (probably too much).

Here's one of my latest finds that I am so excited about...an Ergo baby carrier. Or as you can see, it can also carry a pretty big toddler (up to 40 lb).

Cooking Ahead

Now that I am not working, I am enjoying being at home more & more & more. It really can be a full time job to keep up with everything! I have been working on having a better meal plan every day & being better prepared with shopping and such. This week, I spent one morning for a couple hours, just cooking & the results were wonderful! I want to do more of this & I have really been inspired by Crystal in the blog world (www.moneysavingmom.com , www.biblicalwomanhoodonline.com , www.momoflittles.com - yes, she writes ALL of these). I get so many ideas from her about saving money, shopping, meal planning, activities for little ones, daily scheduling at home, and recipes! She just had her third baby and did a great job posting about her list of things she baked/cooked ahead to freeze for after the baby's birth. Well, it motivated me!

I ended up making a few dishes and some sweet tea for our community group that night & a couple make-ahead recipes including a triple batch of waffles for the freezer and the beginnings of a quiche for dinner tomorrow night.
The waffles turned out GREAT and the recipe was one of the easier I have seen (which is typical of moneysavingmom, recipes are easy, simple, healthy, & cheap!)

Here are the recipes I used:
Waffles
Quiche

And if you want to look further, here is the master list that Crystal had for her freezer with lots of links to recipes.

I would really LOVE to get to the point where my freezer is full of meals and such for after Landis comes!

Getting Organized

I'm trying to take advantage of my 2nd trimester energy with getting organized, having a more consistent routine at home and with Karis, and getting projects done around the house before Landis is born. (By the way, if I haven't told you, that is her name...Landis Alethea Lanier - my home town :) & the Greek word for truth.)

This new chalkboard wall in my kitchen is really helping me! It's chalkboard paint with a frame around it and I love the way it turned out! I realize more and more that I am an "out of sight-out of mind" kind of person with tasks (not people.) So, having a calendar with dinner plan, a To Do list, and a shopping list right in front of me all the time really helps me stay on top of things better. It also really helps me & Dee communicate & stay connected about what's going on in our family (& he likes seeing what's for dinner!).

And here's my big list titled "Before Landis Arrives"

• safety latches: kitchen & bathroom cabinets, china cab drawers?
• chalkboard wall in kitchen - DONE
  
• curtains & pictures back up (all done except master bedroom curtains)
  
• buy toddler bed - DONE (with an offer to borrow one from a great friend!)
  
• re-do closet shelving
  
• organize kids' clothes (Karis' done)
  
• carpet cleaned
• garage cleaned out???
• buy garment rack for guest closet
• make play area in guest room
• clean out guest dresser drawers
• painting ceiling in kitchen
• painting trim at entry, hall, & guest
• dig up garden
• get "material" for under swings
  fix gates on fence
  re-organize dee's closet
  new pediatrician?
  new insurance
  reorganize appliance cabinet
  get laundry sorter??

You know sometimes it helps just to make it public. I keep adding to this list in my head. I know my energy won't last long...I am 25 weeks into the pregnancy this week and I am starting to feel tired again. But I have a wonderful husband who hasn't minded all the projects and great friends who help me a lot!

When I was in full-time ministry, I struggled with the pride of believing I could change people, sinfully thinking if I could just get enough time with them and say the right words, they would live differently, think differently, be different. Lately I feel almost the exact opposite. The circumstances that people around me are in are so heavy and they seem so deep that I feel inept at speaking to it at all. Some of that is an appropriate growth in my heart and understanding that only the Lord brings change in people and their lives and some of it points to the severity and depth of the situations I am around right now. All I feel confident to do is pray and wait and love them through it. It's so hard.
From friends stuck in sin and addicted to their idols to young students living in such destructive lifestyles to marriages being ravaged by infidelity to abusive relationships to a friend losing a baby at 18 weeks in their pregnancy and having to go through labor and delivery to a friend going through the grief of losing her mom. There is so much pain, seen and unseen. What do you say? What do you do?
Pray...love...wait, and trust that only the LORD can speak to places of deep sin and deep pain.

5 Things (ok, maybe only 4)

I have a really hard time getting going in the morning. Once I get moving and productive, I'm ok. But there are more days than I would like to admit that it takes me a while to get anything done. I am not a natural self-starter. So maybe if I write this publicly, it will help me. :) (though I know may of you don't read this anymore because I NEVER update it.)

Things I need to do before Karis is up (not necessarily in this order)
1 - get dressed
2 - make my bed
3 - start my cup of coffee
4 - have some time reading/praying with the Lord (even it's just a short time)


Things I would like to do after Karis is up
1 - start a load of laundry
2 - not turn on Good Morning America
3 - clear dishes from sink/dishwasher
4 - have some quiet reading time with Karis during and after breakfast


(and while I'm at it)
Things I would like to do in the evening
1 - make Dee's lunch for the next day
2 - sweep the kitchen floor
3 - take off my makeup
4 - clear dishes from sink/dishwasher

We'll see if this helps me. I can tend to be great at planning, but not so good at following through.
Are there any things in your morning/evening routine that you do consistently?

Snow Day!

Appliance/Electronics Graveyard

This is what Dana, my sister-in-law, has dubbed my house. And today I'm convinced it's true. These are the things that have happened just in the past several weeks...

-Our washer went out, so we replaced it.
-Our dryer and dishwasher were on their last legs also, so we took further advantage of the sale at Sears and replaced them.
-Our television went out AGAIN and Best Buy finally replaced it.
-Our 6 month old Dyson is not acting right, but of course, the repair guy says there's nothing wrong with it (still dealing with that one with Dyson).
-The mustang won't start and won't jump off...pretty sure it's the battery, just haven't gotten around to dealing with that.
-This weekend, our Mac crashed - won't start up at all, took it to the Mac store, and it needs a new hard drive. Dee is working on getting our files off of it.

I told Dee I was going to go ahead and shoot our other car, the oven, & the refrigerator just to put them out of their misery, since they're doomed here.

In the midst of all this, we were driving home from the mall after receiving the dreaded verdict at the Mac store and we were listening to J.R. It was a song I love about leaving all our cares with the Lord and how He dries our tears and gives us joy and peace. Then we passed the scene of a wreck where the ambulance was already there with its doors open ready to take someone away. You know, so much more could happen. It doesn't take away the frustration of all that's happening to our gadgets or our wallet, but it does put it in perspective.

He is faithful even when so much else is not.

Successes and Mishaps!

I am slowly learning as a parent that really my child is teaching me. I've had some friends ask me, "How did you know to do (that) with her?" "How did you know she was ready for ______?" Ultimately, there are 2 big things other than the Lord's grace to teach me and show me and give me wisdom as a Mommy.

1 - My friends - I see wisdom and faithfulness in my friends as they parent their kids. I see the mom do something or the child do something and I think, "Hmmmm. I should probably try that too. I haven't even thought about encouraging/teaching Karis to do (that)."

2 - Karis - A lot of times she shows me when she's ready for something. I remember the first time she responded to me when I corrected her or gave her an instruction and I said, "Ok?" She said "K." I thought, ...Hmmm, I should probably start consistently making her respond to me verbally when I say something.

Well, with the whole subject of potty training, I have felt at a loss. I don't know how to do this. When is she ready? I don't want to start too soon, etc. Then over the last few months, she does these things...

She brings me the changing pad and a diaper and lays down in front of me for a diaper change.





She helps Bear go potty.





She wants her Baby to have a diaper change first.





Well, I am no parenting expert, but I can see some signs! :) So, I decided to jump in and try it with the book, "Toilet Training in Less than a Day". Amazingly, she is doing SO GOOD! I am now a believer! I have truly been surprised at how fast she's getting it. I know we are just in the beginning but she has a great start. We had an intense morning of training Wednesday. She had 5 accidents that day, 2 of which she came to me saying "Potty" but just didn't make it in time. Yesterday or today she hasn't had an accident yet! So, we'll keep encouraging and helping. We haven't left the house yet, which we will tonight to visit friends and we'll go to church Sunday, so we'll see how it goes.



Well, those are the successes. Here are a couple mishaps (and laughs) of potty training.

The first day she pooped in the potty after peeing a few times. She just kept looking at it and telling me to look at it. She was so proud, but she wouldn't pick up the pot from the little potty to dump it in the toilet. I told her, "Karis, poo-poo goes in the big potty just like pee-pee. Put the poo-poo in the big potty." Well, such a good listener she is, she reached right down there and picked up that poo-poo and turned around to hand it to me!
"NO, NO KARIS! YUCKY, YUCKY!" So we washed hands good after that!

Then yesterday, she was attempting to put the seat back on the little potty after dumping it. She gets it turned around a lot and gets tired of it and just wants me to do it. I've really been trying to encourage her to do it herself. So, as she was trying, I just left the bathroom to leave her to finish. She came into the kitchen a few seconds later, holding up the potty seat with her face in the hole, saying "Look, Mommy." Again, "NO, NO KARIS! YUCKY, YUCKY!"

:) Doesn't parenting stretch us and make us laugh and teach us patience and teach us how to be a teacher??

I love it.

Symphony Tickets!!

I have 6 tickets available for the Charlotte Symphony! It's the Magic of Christmas performance on Saturday, December 6 at 2:30pm. I have 3 pairs of tickets all on the Orchestra level, mid-level rows. I ended being given 10 of them and am not going to use them all. They sell for $50 online, but you can have them for $25 each. Let em know if you want them!

Potty Training advice

So I guess we're at the beginning of the process with the potty around here. I realize Karis is barely 18 months and I am not in a rush. However, she is showing some signs of readiness. She's talking about the potty a lot, tells us about pee-pee and poo-poo, though I don't think it always coincides with the act of doing it. We borrowed my mom's little potty and Karis asks to sit on it a lot - a few times every day. Last week she pooped on the potty twice and today jumped up from the potty and peed on the floor. So, with the list of her symptoms :), what would any of you suggest? books, materials, when to start training panties (she has been doing pull-ups during the day), should I just let her go gradually b/c she's young or be more intentional now that she's showing signs? I don't want to start too early when she's not really ready, just to go backwards. I would love to hear some tips and stories from my experienced mom friends!

How do you respond...

when someone makes a racist comment? I'm not talking about on TV or overheard in the grocery store. I mean in a direct conversation with you and they say it like of course you would agree. I had that happen yesterday. I have noticed that since I married Dee, no one really says anything about blacks anymore. But that doesn't stop them from making really derogatory comments about Hispanics. I feel just as offended when I hear it. I don't have a relationship with anyone right now that is Hispanic, but I feel more sensitive to minorities in general since marrying Dee. It seems (in my unresearched opinion) that a lot of Southerners are conscious of racism against blacks and are more careful about their words. However, there is much freedom in comments against "Mexicans". Because that is the term used for ALL people of Hispanic origin. Dee has even told me that on the west coast, "Hispanic" is not really an accepted term, but you should say "Latino" instead. I have had several instances where people I know make very negative comments about them, saying that they are uneducated, dirty, don't take care of their children, and are here to "take over". AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!! I want to confront it when I hear it, but I really don't know how to do it with a balance of firm clarity and gentleness. Do you ever deal with this?

Ever Been There?

Have you ever been in that place where you're the new one in the group? You feel awkward, don't really know what to say. You want someone to talk to you, but don't know what to talk about. Ok, ok, I'm talking about myself. Dee & I went to a community group for the first time at the church we've been attending for the last couple months. It really was good and we enjoyed it. They passed out paper and pens and asked everyone to write down a question or topic to discuss. It could be about anything. I could NOT think of anything to write. So I didn't. I know that sounds lame, but I couldn't get away from the thoughts in my head. What's this group like? How do they interact? Are there Christians or non-Christians? In that setting, I tend to get really quiet.

I hate that awkward feeling. But it's required to get to know new people, right?

Motherhood is a Distraction

Is this just a new mom thing or will it stay with me? Motherhood can be such a distraction to me. I know that sounds terrible like I don't want to be a mom or I'm not enjoying it. That's not the case at all. I LOVE being a mom and I really enjoy being with, teaching, playing with, and training Karis and I really look forward to more children being in the mix with us. But...I feel consumed with it at times. I don't feel nervous/anxious as when Karis was an infant, but much of my mental and emotional energy is wrapped up in being a mom.

It is a distraction from my relationship with the Lord. At the onset of my day, I am thinking about things to prepare and the reality of the hour in the context of our schedule. At the end of the day, I'm tired and trying to process what needs to be done for the next day. I have a really hard time at church lately. It takes me a while for my mind to slow down and stop working from what's happened that morning, how Karis is doing in the nursery (which is not too good lately) and keeping an eye on the screen to see if Karis' number comes up for me to come get her. When I do sit to read or think to pray, it's hard for my mind to settle.

Will it get better? Or is it just a discipline issue? I am so out of the habit of being with the Lord, I just feel rusty.